Roller-coaster

Living with E.I. is a roller-coaster.
For a long time, it was all downward spirals and sideways corkscrews for me.
Thankfully, with the right help, I've been able to make some steady upward progress. But that doesn't eliminate the downward plunges or upside down loops.

For example...
In December God brought me to the top of a huge hill - I got off the Cortef medication!
Of course, shortly after that I had an awful reaction to some herbicide, it took over a week to recover. I was just starting to feel better when I reacted to something on Christmas Day!
After two weeks, I was about back to "normal" (for me) when I had another chemical exposure.
I got over that one, then we had fumes in the oven - we couldn't use it for two weeks.
Finally got that straightened out, and then we got gasoline fumes in the house...we're still trying to get those cleared out.
(And this is just a little snapshot of my life, not including all the other twists & turns.)

But E.I. life isn't without its "ups," thanks to God's grace.

One day I was crying out to God in anguish of spirit, just tired of this trial, tired of the struggle, but also tired of this imperfect life, its pain and impermanance.
Then, like someone had flipped a switch in my brain, I realized that, really and truly, earth has nothing I desire! (Ps. 73:25) Everything I love, all that I long for is already stored up for me in heaven!
In a moment God took me from the depths of anguish to the heights of joy! He used the difficulty of my trial, the loops and plunges, to bring me to a place of spiritual awareness and deeper intimacy with Him.

I understand now that if I hadn't gone through the "downs" of the roller-coaster, I wouldn't have experienced the "ups" either.

I guess all of life is a roller-coaster, not just E.I. life. Heaven is our "finish line," our place of permanance and perfection. Until then we're still on this wild ride.

So while sometimes on this roller-coaster I'm holding on for dear life, other moments I'm lifting my hands and shouting for joy!